Jesus, the voices
I’ve looked at this from every possible angle, and the only way to get back at Charlie for watching “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” while I’m trying to grade papers is to puncture his eardrums with these knitting needles.
Why titles should mean stuff
I tried to watch “V” but it was about aliens.
Apparently Charlie and I have different ideas about what “Pick up a funny mug for my boss” means.
There are some pretty cute ideas out there, but I think a good cereal company slogan would be, “We have thoughtfully designed our bags to prevent them from splitting down the side when you open them!”
Wait a minute!
If filling up the gas tank while the car is turned on really makes it blow up, why don’t I hear about more cars exploding?
I’m 25.
Most of my epiphanies can be traced back to some lie my mum told me.
Ok, you got me
It’s time to pack it in and try again tomorrow when the student loan representative finally frustrates me into saying “irregardless.”
Pogo - Go Out and Love Someone
I don’t mean to brag, but I’m pretty good at making decisions.
Step 1: lose my shit.
Step 2: come up with several nightmare scenarios.
Step 3: ask Charlie.
Step 4: get annoyed with Charlie.
Step 5: settle on previously unexplored simple solution.
Peter Gabriel - Here Comes the Flood
